The great challenge in accepting hard Church teachings

Much has been said and misunderstood about the Church’s teachings about her stand and wisdom behind the LGBT issue.  Here in Singapore, the Church had been cautious through the years to weigh in on the issue at hand, but as of late, because of the strong views held by those who have SSA (same sex attraction) and who have been advocating the acceptance of such active lifestyles, our Bishop spoke up in an official capacity as head of the local church, making it clear what the Church teachings are, but at the same time making it very clear that the Church also does try her best to balance her teachings with an abundance of charity and compassion towards those who suffer. 

The reaction from the public, especially those who choose to live out their SSA in an active way, has been strident to say the least.  Why is this so?  There are many different reasons for this, but perhaps the one reason which makes the most sense is that of faith, or lack of it.  Without doubt, Church teachings can seem hard, inflexible and unyielding.  Even more so if one is only looking at such teachings as an external observer, with a keen eye to notice only selective teachings without being able to comprehend the larger whole.  To be sure, one of the things that enables one to accept ‘hard’ teachings is faith – faith in God, deep belief that this God is loving, and faith in the Church being the visible sign of God’s presence in a sinful and broken world.  Teachings about chastity are not the only hard teachings.  Acceptance of Christ’s real presence in the Eucharist can be an equally hard teaching but we don’t see the Church getting soft on that at all.  Of course, we do not put the Eucharist and the call to chastity on the same level of theological dogmatic importance, but I did it to make a point.  There are strong reasons why the Church seems to be unbending in her teachings.  It takes faith to hold on to them and accept them.  It is often when this faith is weak and wavering that one makes the initial movement to live outside of what the Church calls ‘grace’.

Whenever I come across vitriolic spewed at the Church from livid SSA advocates, excoriating the Church's seeming rigid stand on such issues, one of the first things that I ask myself is whether there are signs that show that the writer or speaker is an unbaptized person, or if the person has left the Church.  In almost all cases, this is found to be true.  Yes, in some very painful cases, it could have well been a reaction that found its sad origins in one having been abused by members of the clergy.  The Church has paid (and is still paying) dearly for such sins.  But that cannot be the reason for the majority.  For many, it has been the unwillingness to accept the fact that the call to discipleship and eventual sainthood will always entail the carrying of the cross, and this cross comes in so many different forms.  The virtue of longsuffering is often furthest from the minds of such advocates.  For the disciple of Christ with SSA inclinations, the cross necessarily includes a physical denial of the self.  The call to chastity and chaste living is a call to every disciple of Christ, whether one is married or single, lay or cleric.  The deeper one’s faith is, the clearer will this call to holiness be. 

But when one only chooses to follow the physical demands of the flesh with no regard for borders or controls of any kind, one starts then to put aside the call or vocation of godliness to make the self and one’s needs the centre of everything.  To still want to be a faithful disciple of Christ and live out in an active SSA lifestyle would be tantamount to living a life of disequilibrium, which will end up tearing the person apart from within. 

But this dilemma does not only apply to these brothers and sisters alone.  Anyone who is living a lifestyle that is contrary to church teachings and considers themselves disciples of Christ and his Church does this to himself – examples abound – people being unfaithful in marriage, people who regularly lie and cheat and steal, people who have no qualms in using others for their own benefit, employers who do not treat their employees or domestic helpers with justice or respect, etc.  And when one’s conscience is numbed, one will have no qualms about receiving the Eucharist whilst living a double life.  The only difference is that these sins are often hidden and acted out clandestinely, whilst those advocating an open SSA lifestyle are bold and public about this, which makes it slightly more of a challenge for the Church to treat with charity and compassion.

When a disciple of Christ abandons any thoughts or acceptance of living a sacrificial life, something else happens rather unnoticed - one will automatically shift one’s locus of life from the soul or spirit to the body.  Listening to the body and giving in to its multifarious demands for gratification and physical needs will become easier and easier as one abandons the Cross.  To be able to see this movement and still love the person with sincere love and charity is one of the great challenges of any LGBT Christian support group.  Where this love, charity and compassion is lacking, an opening will be made for intolerance, finger-pointing and acrimony.

Perhaps what is sorely needed now is a real Saint who has lived the life of chastity and faithfulness as a result of deep faith even though he or she had been given the cross of being same sex attracted.  This person would then be the solid example that listening to the soul and following its challenging path is not a feeble choice, but a stalwart one.  And if there are real-life stories about how he or she when faced with temptations of the flesh chose the harder route of denying the self (and suffered even further as a result of the choice for God) that led to a greater peace and silent joy, they would be great sources of encouragement to those who choose to live out their faith with courage and devotion.  These saints would then be patrons of those who want to carry the Cross bravely, but also acknowledge that one needs spiritual help to do this well.

Perhaps this may not be materialized in our generation.  I do hope that one day, this will happen for the benefit of many of our SSA brothers and sisters in the faith who are living in very challenging times.  I too, join my bishop and pray for your faith and courage to be strengthened each day and offer up my physical sufferings in my convalescence for your call to holiness.