Getting that belt tied around us and taken to where we'd rather not go.

The gospel of John, the last of the gospels written, is markedly different from the other three, which are often referred to as ‘synoptics’ (Greek synopsis, “view together”). 

Written later than the other three, John’s writing style and theology stands out.  It doesn’t take a scripture scholar to notice that the Jesus in John can seem more divine than human, leading some noted scholars to say that if John’s gospel was the only gospel we have, we would hardly know much about the humanity of Jesus.

In the post resurrection narrative in John’s gospel, Jesus asks Peter those three very poignant, searing and pertinent questions – “do you love me?”  It was, as some commentaries tell us, Jesus’ way of allowing Peter to repent of his three denials of his master before he was crucified on Calvary for the sins of humankind.  To be sure, I don’t think we will ever know the true reasons for those three questions, though of course, this reason does make a lot of spiritual sense.

It was after this that Jesus tells Peter something about his life and all of our own lives – it is a very striking and somber statement that while he was young, Peter used to dress himself and go where he wanted.  But when he grows old, he will stretch out his hands and someone else will dress him and lead him where he does not want to go. 

Peter the true disciple who became the first Pope, indeed saw this happen to his life.  Jesus, in telling Peter this, is in fact giving us all an insight into true discipleship and preparing us all for a life that should not be surprised or confounded when we find our lives mired in some kind of challenge, difficulty and unexplainable suffering. 

This pretty much sums up and is the narrative for almost all of us.  We all have those experiences of our younger, nubile and yes, even willful years when we dressed ourselves and went wherever we wanted.  This is a metaphorical way of saying that we simply lived as if the world orbited around us.  Some would say that those were the ‘best’ times of our lives, when there seemed to be no limit to what we could achieve or experience, and the world did appear to be our oyster.  Just a quick scan of the plethora of videos on YouTube of Commencement speakers at college graduations (a lot of them from America) will reveal that most of them say the same thing in different ways to the graduands.  Do not put limits on your dreams and you can achieve anything you set your mind to.  While on the surface this kind of message does seem to be uplifting, encouraging and positive, it can subliminally tell these people that all limits and boundaries are to be disdained and even disrespected, just so long as one is able to attain one’s desires, no matter what they may be.

But if we take Jesus’ words to Peter to heart, it will dawn on us that total human freedom and subjective expression without respecting borders of any kind may not be the best thing that we can do for ourselves.  In fact, it could well be the worst thing.

Of course, I do know that reflecting on this on a blog like this could only make sense if one is truly interested in reaching any level of spiritual sensibility.  If you were an atheist reading this reflection, you would most likely have stopped reading this three paragraphs ago, or are readying yourself with a vitriolic rebuttal to debunk all that came before.  But if you, dear reader, are a searcher of truth and see the folly of only always seeking what thrills delights and titillates, the words of Jesus will words of life, because he IS the Word.

But in truth, his words are true not just for those who are beginning to see the wisdom in moving themselves out of the centre of their universe.  It is just as applicable to people whose whole lives are displaced and experience some kind of dislocation.  I’m thinking of people who have just been told that they have a very slim chance of seeing their next birthday because of a grim prognosis, or a spouse realizing that his or her marriage is no longer salvageable, or a parent who is at the deathbed of her child and who knows that there is no way that she will be driving home with her child ever again from that hospital and that she will never be playing with her toys at home. 

These are the kinds of places that we go to only when there is a rope tied around us.  These are the situations where we are dressed by others because we are either unwilling or unable to ourselves.  We find ourselves in a new location – and that we have been dislocated.  That we are led there when we are older often means that we are also conscripted there, often by a conspiracy of circumstances rather than by choice.  After all, one only gets conscripted or drafted only when one is of age.  Indeed, it is rarely by choice that we go to those border situations on our own.  Would that it be that we enter into these times by a gentle hand, but the truth is that quite often, it hits us unawares and sends us reeling.

But it is when we show our grit as faithful disciples of Christ that we slowly see the necessity of surrender under such trying circumstances.  It is only those who have some semblance of faith in God and that he and he alone holds the universe in place who are willing to admit that all that one can see at any one point of time is merely a tiny corner of God’s immense and enormous plan, and we are but blessed cooperators of God.

Our task as priests and spiritual mentors to souls is most challenging and most necessary at such times in the lives of the faithful.  I must admit that oftentimes, it is difficult and painful to see people being led to these places. 

 

It may seem odd but I do believe that at these times, realizing what baptism really means can strengthen our faith.  Baptism, understood in a very broad way, is a displacement.  It places us outside of a merely physical and material world, and brings us into the spiritual.  It gives us a life that supernatural – beyond that of nature itself.  And of course, living in faith makes sense only when we live in Christ by virtue of our baptism. 

And when we dare to live this faithfully and this large, we know ultimately that even though we are led to places we would rather not go, that it is the love of God beyond our fathoming that we are led to places that we need to go to, for the betterment of our very own souls.